ADDICTION

Charcoal on sugar paper, 2020

size 84.1 x 59.4 cm

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I have been smoking cigarettes for almost seven years, and now that I have been observing my body alone in my own residence. I can't help but notice that it is a perfect time to quit. Quitting was never easy for me since there's a lot of variables that keeps bringing me back to nicotine. Now that I have changed to electronic cigarette in hope that the addiction would get better. I was wrong. The habit just changed from one to another form of addiction. The temporary pleasure from nicotine that flow down though my throat is gone by the time it reach the organs beneath the neck. While the upper part of the body including the brain are enjoying the effect from nicotine, the lower part carries a heavy duty. The heart beat faster, lungs work harder. Each and every organs in my body are chained in one united form of catastrophe. Rotten away what is chained up and failing the whole system. Even though E-cigarette has lower risk than the normal cigarettes, but risk is still risk. In the end, quitting by changing to another form of addiction is nothing but excuses I keep telling myself. Prolonging the time of my collapsing lungs.